There were some great looks last night at the ceremony (even more at the after parties). BUT (and that's a big but) I was in no way, shape or form gasping at anyone this year a la Gwyneth Paltrow in her white get-up from last year. I was actually kind of bored.
Naomi Watts looked beautiful. The neckline was so interesting and different. And she managed to wear sequins and not look like she strolled out of Cache looking like a contestant from Miss America. Kudos to you, Naomi. Not an easy thing to accomplish.
Jessica Chastain looked incredible as well. The thing that tied her ENTIRE look together? The lip color. It all would have been SO wrong if she hadn't picked up that lipstick.
Sally Field. What is there to not love about her. That was a statement, not a question. Her skit with Seth? It made me love her even more. And I really liked what she chose. And it would have worked on someone half her age as well (with some serious hardware). She looked absolutely elegant.
You know that scene in Titanic where Kate Winslet takes a huge sip out of her pint and then proceeds to stand on her tip-tippie toes? That's how I'm standing on the fence about Jennifer Lawrence. On one side is the iffy print of the fabric of her gown and the color and the other side is everything I love about her. She looked gorgeous. She glowed. She accessorized LIKE A BOSS. That back necklace made me coo like a baby. The way she absolutely owned tripping up the stairs and her interview with reporters after the Oscars made me want to be her friend. So I fall to the side of just loving her so I have to put her on my favorites list and choose to ignore that her dress was borderline bridal Barbie. The necklace and the earrings win.
Doesn't she look great draped on the stairs?
Lily Collins. After the Oscars at Vanity Fair. Probably my favorite look of the night. This dress and her look is on another level. It all just worked. She got the hair right. The makeup was flawless. And it all could have gone oh-so-very wrong. But it didn't. And I applaud her.
HATE to admit this but I loved Miley's dress at the after party as well. Not on board with her hair style but the dress was on point.
This probably isn't up anyone else's alley but I, for one, loved this on Leslie Mann. The color, the sleeves, the detail. Retro-chic without looking like a serious mess.
Diane Kruger. Risky. But I love it on her.
And getting down to business. The misses of the night.
I must start with Anne Hathaway. WHY? Did she not consult Rachel Zoe? Why would she choose a dress that had darts in the fabric that made her look like he had robo-nipples? Years from now, NO ONE is going to remember that it was the night she won her first Oscar. They'll remember it was the year of the nipple dress. I kind of expected whipped cream to come shooting out of her boobs after she won the award. And even without the added nipple effect, it looked like it was something Drew Barrymore wore in 1994 during her flower child phase. And that necklace? Just awful.
Kristen Stewart. Why do producers think it's a good idea to let her present anything at all. They must know she is going to sound like she is so bored and put out. Entertainment factor? Something for us to talk about the next day? She rolled out of bed and threw a dress on. At least her hair looked clean? Would it have killed her to run a brush through the hair?
Zoe Saldana. Too many things are wrong here. Clearly, she wasn't trying to win back Mr. Cooper.
Selma Hayek? Doesn't she have access to like 95% of the designers in the world? Her husband owns most of them! No joke. Then tell me why this happened. Someone. Please tell me. And who let her wear a tiara. No, no, no and no.
And I'm citing both Heidi Klum and Brandi Glanville (whythehellwassheeventhere) with terrible boob exposure.